I've never met him, but I imagine him to be an impeccably well dressed and charming gentleman with a slightly evil sounding yet nonetheless reassuring laugh.



Me: So Joe, getting an exact match for this custom 53 stage paint on my Coop will be cheap and straightforward, right?
Joe: Oh yes, it won't be a problem at all......... https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=E2c32SvJf54
Me thinking to myself: Wow, what a nice fella!

Funny you should say that...

Yes that is funny actually

Hello, I'm mrsjuliet williams of Queensland Australia i am widow suffering from cancer leukemia and
i have a short life to live. I have decided to entrust in your hand my inheritance for a charitable
and humanitarian divine project to help fulfill my last wish on earth. Kindly get back to me
through my email address for more details in regards to the divine project.
mrsjulietwilliams10@gmail.com
may God Bless You,

This is just lazy, write up a scam, have google translate it in to several languages followed by sending all of them hoping one is readable to said person.......

MONEY/ DINERO / GELD / DINHEIRO / ДЕНЬГИ / MY NAME IS LAWYER LAURENTIN JEAN NOEL OF THE REPUBLIC OF TOGO IN AFRICA, I NEED YOUR ASSISTANCE TO TRANSFER US $ 13,500,000.00 DOLLARS / US $ 13.5 MILLION DOLLARS FROM THE BANK HERE TO SHARE BETWEEN YOU AND ME. ANSWER FOR MORE DETAILS. EMAIL : laurentinjeannoel@seznam.cz

DINERO / MI NOMBRE ES ABOGADO LAURENTIN JEAN NOEL DE LA REPÚBLICA DE TOGO EN ÁFRICA, NECESITO SU ASISTENCIA PARA TRANSFERIR US $ 13,500,000.00 DÓLARES / US $ 13.5 MILLONES DE DÓLARES DEL BANCO AQUÍ PARA COMPARTIR ENTRE USTED Y YO. RESPUESTA PARA MÁS DETALLES. EMAIL : laurentinjeannoel@seznam.cz

GELD / MEIN NAME IST RECHTSANWALT LAURENTIN JEAN NOEL VON DER REPUBLIK TOGO IN AFRIKA. ICH BRAUCHE IHRE UNTERSTÜTZUNG, UM 13,5 MILLIONEN DOLLAR VON DER BANK HIER ZWISCHEN IHNEN UND MIR ZU ÜBERWEISEN. ANTWORT FÜR MEHR DETAILS. EMAIL: laurentinjeannoel@seznam.cz

DINHEIRO / MEU NOME É ADVOGADO LAURENTIN JEAN NOEL DA REPÚBLICA DE TOGO EM ÁFRICA, PRECISO DA SUA ASSISTÊNCIA TRANSFERE US $ 13.500.000,00 DÓLARES / US $ 13,5 MILHÕES DE DÓLARES DO BANCO AQUI PARA COMPARTILHAR ENTRE VOCÊ E EU. RESPOSTA PARA MAIS DETALHES. EMAIL : laurentinjeannoel@seznam.cz

ДЕНЬГИ / МОЕ ИМЯ - АДВОКАТ ЛОРЕНТИН ДЖИН НОЛ РЕСПУБЛИКИ ТОГО В АФРИКЕ, Я НУЖНА ВАШЕЙ ПОМОЩИ В ПЕРЕВОДЕ 13 500 000 ДОЛЛАРОВ США / 13,5 МИЛЛИОНОВ ДОЛЛАРОВ США ОТ БАНКА ЗДЕСЬ, ЧТОБЫ ПОДЕЛИТЬСЯ МЕЖДУ ВАМИ И МНОЙ. ОТВЕТЬТЕ НА БОЛЬШЕ ДЕТАЛЕЙ.EMAIL : laurentinjeannoel@seznam.cz

You'd think they could siphon off just enough from their hoard to pay for someone to proof-read their messages

Exactly, it wouldn't cost much would it

Tax-deductible too

It's always good if you write it off against your business.... I mean scam!

Really

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Bonjour,

Votre carte bancaire est arrivée à expiration. Puisqu'il s'agit du seul mode de paiement sur votre compte,

votre utilisation des services mobiIe.free.fr sera être limitée prochainement jusqu'à ce que vous mettiez à

jour les informatiions de la carte bancaire.

> Mettez à jour le numéro de votre carte bancaire et la date d'expiration et le cryptogramme visuel de votre carte

dès que possible .



METTRE A JOUR MA CARTE

Vous pouvez à tout moment désactiver la réception
des email dans votre espace abonné.

Sincères salutations.
L'équipe Free
--
Free Mobile - SAS au capital de 365.138.779 Euros - RCS PARIS 499 247 138

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Hello,

Your bank card has expired. Since this is the only payment method on your account,

your use of mobiIe.free.fr services will be limited soon until you set

update the credit card information.

> Update your credit card number and expiration date and the visual cryptogram of your card

as soon as possible .



UPDATE MY CARD

You can deactivate reception at any time
emails in your subscribed area.

Best regards.
The Free team
-
Free Mobile - SAS with a capital of 365,138,779 Euros - RCS PARIS 499 247 138

Hello there,

I am Jubril Khalid. I am contacting you because I have a proposal
that I think may interest you. I represent the interest of my
brother in-law who is a minister in the Syrian Government. As you
probably know, there is a lot of crisis going on currently in
Syria and my brother in-law has fallen out with the ruling Junta
especially the president because of his foreign policies and
these senseless war and killings that has been going on for a
while. Everybody in Syria is fed up and want a change but the
president is too powerfull and he simply kills anyone that tries
to oppose him. My brother in-law has moved to support the
opposition to empower them to be able to fight and repel the
ruling party but unfortunately, his efforts has been unsuccessful
and he is now currently being arrested for plotting to unseat the
ruling leader. They have seized all his assets and he is now very
scared for the safety of his family especially his kids.

Before he was arrested, he has asked me to help him find a
foreign investor who can help him accommodate and invest 100 MUSD
privately that he has lodged in a finance house abroad. He wants
these funds safely invested so that the future and safety of his
family can be secured.

I am contacting you with the hope that you will be interested in
helping us. We need your help to accommodate and lodge the funds
in the banking system in your country and also invest it in a
very productive projects. We will handle the logistics involved
in the movement of the funds to you. Please note that the entire
business will be executed in a legal way. My brother in-law has
promised to compensate you handsomely for your role in this
business. Do you think you can handle this?

He wants this to be done discretely so I will be acting as his
eyes and ears during the course of this transaction.

If this proposal interests you, please kindly respond so that I
can give you more details.

Regards,

Jubril.

Well he's very polite so he may be genuine

I have to agree Simon, it is polite, written really well and with good punctuation

Go on then Joe, you know you want to, give him a break

Ha, would you believe it, the exact same courteous cove has just turned up on in the club email, which gives me reason to be suspicious..

Email was from khalidjubril01@mail.com, IP address 195.181.244.201

This is new territory for me - the source contains what appears to be many IP addresses but the nearest to the above is 194.135.80.26, the email address being identical.

That might mean he has a dynamic IP address if they're matching, what about the sever ID 15.20.2686.25

You're beginning to blind me with science again Joe

Ok, the only other is 212.24.96.174 apart from one which appears a few times and I'm pretty sure is the club email IP.

Mr Google says a Dynamic IP address is one associated with home networks so this is evidence that our learned friend is scamming "frae the hoose"?

Dear Sir/Madam
My name is General Rupert Jones , serving in the Engineering military unit in Ba'qubah in Iraq.
We found some money here in Baqubah in Iraq,We are looking for a foreign partner to help us move this money out of iraq,for investment ,please If you are interested kindly contact me for more details,
Thanks

Compliments of the day.

I acquired your details from companies directory.
I am looking for a foreign partner to help me in
foreign investment.

Please get back to me for more details.

Regards.
Dr. Mahmood Alatif Mahmood

This is a bit different...


DEAR LORD, GOOD NIGHT. I AM PORTUGUESE AND I AM IN PORTUGAL. It took me years to restore two classic cars of the yellow color of the license plates (Seata SPRING 850 model). I had a hard time getting all the source materials to finish them. When I started, I don't intend to sell them, but now I understand the 1932 mg j2 (mmm), which I am restoring and which is making me very happy despite the difficulties in the parts. That said, publish a car sale here in Portugal, having come to the conclusion that this country has no purchase. CAN I SELL IN ENGLAND? After seeing upcoming events, can an organization help me? DITA SAYS THAT: WHO DOES NOT ASK THAT THERE IS NO GOD. THANK YOU FROM YOUR HELP MANUEL SUNDAYS

By bothering to open and read their crap you are confirming that they have reached a valid email, thus will both bombard that address with more crap, and also sell it on to another scammer.

Best zapped before reading.

Eek, there's no hiding place!


Actually the ones I dug up must have been read already as they weren't in bold

Only if you're daft enough to open them with a brain dead mail client, or a web interface. A sensible client neither downloads images nor runs scripts in the mail... and therefore leaves no footprints to follow.

I wish you and your family a happy & healthy 2020. Please, confirm if you received my most recent email dated Jan 24, 2020?
I am Phillip Chippewa. I won $80 million Powerball jackpot U.S. lottery on oct 28, 2019
my email is not a hoax or a scam email. it is real.and do not say it looks too good to be true, you're mistaken

https://www.powerball.com/winner-story/mi-lottery-suttons-bay-man-wins-80-million-powerball-jackpot

reply to me with your acceptance if only you wish to accept my donation to you, and if otherwise kindly delete my email to you

Thank you, and take my congratulations once again!



Thank you.
Sincerely yours,
Phillip Chippewa
power-ball jackpot winner

This looks very timely Neil, should well cover your removal costs


If only I'd get one, it might go some way toward paying for BumbleBee's restoration!

I don't know what's more a con, Neil's email or the fact that Chippewa won $80 million but because he took it as a one-time lump sum payment he received $55.3 million, then tax leaving him only $42 million, that's harsh!

Well, it's good to know, after all these years, that



But please... the best thing he can think of to buy is a Dodge Charger?