AKA consultant-speak.

What it is with mangling nouns to make a ridiculous verb of them, which are then used in place of a much shorter and simpler verb - from which the noun was often taken in the first place?

Case in point: some chap on the radio this morning kept insisting that people 'utilise' hospitals.

They don't. They *use* them.

'To utilise' is a distressing and pointless verb formation from utilisation, which means the amount (percentage, say) a facility is used. What it doesn't mean is 'to use'.

It was odd; in his other comments he was talking a lot of sense.

Just make sure that you have your ducks in a row and everyone is singing from the same hymn sheet

Because it makes the individual sound intellectual - Its the kind of mistake I would make coming from an education system that didn't really teach the basics of appropriate sentence construction.
It's been a long hard slog, and will continue to be for quite some time.

Sam, 'it is' or 'it's' please

That's it Joe, I'm jumping in the car and off down to stamp on your foot.

I wouldn't have even spotted that Barnacle, my educators didn't do a very good job I'm afraid.
But they did tell me to never begin a sentence with 'because'

I don't think they ever explained why though?

Myself instead of me... drives me mad or even worse "me myself decided..."

Because they didn't know why?

And shouldn't be used to start a sentence either

We've seen some bad cases of written english coming out of school teachers, they all "should of" known better

My pet hate among these is the verb to administrate; is there something wrong with administer?

Orientate instead of orient...

'Because' is forbidden by teachers because it's *usually* the second half of a clause, so things dangle: I was late today. Because a cow ate my homework.

But... I was late today. Because of that I arrived after the building blew up. <-- nothing wrong with that, and not a *lot* wrong with the first. I think teachers forbid it just because they can.

Even people like Strunk and White, and Mark Twain, accept that the good writer knows when to break the rules.

Whose coat's that jacket?

Spotted on the rear end of a learner car yesterday - "smile, your on camera"

I also find myself ranting at errant apostrophes, especially on signs - sign writers really ought to know better, or if not, employ a proof reader

I always emit a superior looking-down-my-nose tut when hotels mis spell accommodation.

It does my head in when people in my office say that they are very "weary" of something when they mean "wary".

Spotted today whilst on a jaunt through neighbouring towns.

That one is a classic, in more ways then one.

Whos trainers are these shoes. *Welsh accent

Whose boots are these shoes, English accent

Never mind about mis-spelling "miss spell" Tut tut indeed!

I stand corrected. But don't you feel superior now too? Everyone's a winner.

The misuse of the word Decimated always makes me

Should be slated for that!


Our daughter now in USA (and by the way expecting a sprog in May ) always used to say

"Me and Kirsty", "Me and Fiona" instead of "Kirsty and I" in spite of usually being quite correct about stuff. Think she still does

I suppose that while (?whilst?) language is always evolving, punctuation perhaps doesn't.

While (Whilst ) I'm not the greatest at speaking and typing the correct grammar, this really annoys me, especially when I hear it at the end of the likes of ITV's News at 10. I would expect them to speak more 'proper'.

My least favourite is.

Innit

Wtf is that all about? Usage includes:

I'm off to the shop, innit.
I was watching football, innit.
You can't say that, Bro, innit.

As you can see it is as versatile as a full stop, or even a birds eye potato waffle!

You may add 'nartamin' to that usage, BM...

Worse than me/I is me/myself; there seems to be a current usage of myself when me would be more correct: "Who did it?" "It was Kirsty and myself."

Bah.

What a classic

I believe this could be regional, the combination of "do you know what I mean" is lesser spotted up here, but I am hearing more of the words "ask" and "you" being turned into a sneeze - axe choo.

Up here you replace innit with "ken" - but heading west by the time you've reached Glasgow it's morphed into "but" or "bu' ", even "Jim"

In Falkirk you are greeted with "Your oil pressure's away doon, eh ..."

I wish I could rule the world with an iron fist for just 5 minutes.

Those who say "did good" (as in "You did good" or "I did good in English at school today") would fear my righteous wrath.